when there’s a baby on the way?!
I promise this is not the only thing I’m going post about for the next four months. We got a phone call yesterday from a concerned loved . To be fair I can see why those who care about us are worried because all they’ve read are my two somewhat melancholy blog entries. So I thought I’d give you an update on our state of mind.
In a word: Good. After the small possibility of Lucy (there you have it, that’s her name. I’m sick of typing nicknames) having downs syndrome we just needed some time to wallow. And boy oh boy did we wallow. I haven’t cried like that in ages. After a couple of days to process, things started to come back into focus and we gained some perspective.
The odds are overwhelmingly in favor of Lucy Bell (okay, can’t give up the nicknames completely) not having downs syndrome. I’m talking 99.5% that she doesn’t. That remaining half a percent is not worth the 1% risk of a miscarriage with amniocentesis. For us it’s not. That 1% chance of killing her his waaay scarier than the .5% she has DS. Not to mention, that even with a certain diagnosis at this point there is zilch, nada, absolutely nothing we could do to prepare from a practical standpoint. We couldn’t start talking to doctors or lining up specialist. We’d do exactly what we have to do now. Wait. Most parents had no forewarning before their child was born that they were going to have special needs. If that .5% chance rules we won’t be completely blindsided and that’s something to be thankful for too.
Here’s the other piece of it. Worst case scenario at this point it Lucy has Downs Syndrome. That’s it. That’s the scariest thing. After a few days of thinking about this, that doesn’t even sound that scary. I mean, even if we had a 100% positive diagnosis there is still way more to be excited about than there is to be sad or worried about. We’re having a baby in four more months! She’s already amazing. She’s already ours.
Over dinner Don was talking about his mental image of our soon to be family of four. Adding Lucy to our trips to Camedon Yards and camping and sitting with us at the dinner table. Imagining Lucy as a child with Downs Syndrome or not, the picture hardly changes.
So please don’t worry about us. I prayed for peace of mind, and I got it. Quicker than I expected. Now were back to thinking about how we really ought to start getting her room ready. Besides, who on God’s green Earth can be sad while listening to this song and knowing there’s a baby on the way…
The video makes me want to join a hippy commune caravan crossing the country in a converted school bus. I think I’ve been reading too much Spiritual Midwifery. On second thought, having a baby on a bus doesn’t sound so romantic.